KABOOM! There went naptime...

Funny story. Well, okay, not funny, but I tell myself it is so I can stay sane.

The kids and I met up with some other mommy friends and they're kids at the park today for lunch and some playtime. It was beautiful, but sunny and hot. We stayed longer than I had planned and got home almost an hour later than Mogi usually goes down for a nap. And...when we pull into the driveway I see that he's asleep.

But, AJ, she's "talking" away. She'd taken a short nap at the park and apparently was feeling vocal.

I get both the kids in the house and Mogi in his bed without too much disturbance. I feed AJ and lay her in her crib 30 minutes later hoping she'll take the hit and fall asleep. Well, she doesn't. She swings back and forth between delighted squeals and frustrated cries, and I keep going in to try and get her to lower the volume.

She finally gets quiet and no more than 30 minutes later Mogi awakens. He's upset and I put him on the toilet thinking he has to potty and return him to bed. But, he's made so much noise...

Yes, you guessed it... AJ's awake again. And then 15 minutes later Mogi's awake as well.

Wow. Sure glad I don't attempt to be productive during naps. Oh wait, I do. I'm trying to get a PhD!

The end result was me having an extra cup of coffee at 4pm and EARLY BEDTIMES!!

Have any crazy naptime stories you'd love to share???

Some Resolutions

With all the effort that goes into being a mom of two (under two) and all the other things I have going on besides being "mom" I've had to go from being organized to being super organized. So, I've made a few resolutions to help me in that effort. It may not be New Year's, but after The Plague Winter 2011 I needed a kick in the pants to get things going. So, here they are:

1. Stay off Facebook until after 8pm. The only exception is posting pictures from my phone or linking things that I read since neither of these really suck me into Facebook and its multitude of distractions.

2. Go to bed at 10pm. I need my beauty rest and don't have time for a nap during the day.

3. Get up at 6am and meet Jesus before I meet anyone else. Believe me, I'm a much better person to be around if I've had time in the Word and focusing on what really matters. Even if it occasionally means forsaking a shower...

Fall Schedule

I could begin with explanation as to why I haven't written in FOREVER... I'll try not to make it sound too pitiful, but I was sick in one form or another for weeks and Mogi has gone through some sickness and lots of teething too. I had a cold which lingered for weeks and turned into a sinus infection. Both were rough and then when I should have been feeling better I got dehydrated. That ended up sending me to the hospital for fluids and took another week to get my full (pregnant) strength back. I've also been having issues with being able to sleep at night. I was feeling like an insomniac, awake half the night and exhausted all day, but a visit to the doctor has resolved some of that. So, writing just hasn't been on my radar.

Over the last two weeks I have gotten into a bit of routine for work/life and its nice. Simply having a routine makes me feel like a saner person, and its a comfortable routine for me. Mogi also has a new routine with consistently taking one nap a day and that helps my schedule too. Also, he started walking the weekend of August 21st and then started "preschool" on August 31st. I think between the two he uses up so much energy that he needs a long, solid nap each day.

So, here's some of my current work/lifestyle goals: (By the way, being in "school" and having child care help that are college students keeps me in the semester-at-a-time mindset. Although this isn't everyone's reality, it is helpful to have shorter term goals and plans with young children in the home. Their needs/abilities change rather rapidly and you find the need for frequent reassessment at new stages.)

1. Have ~20 hours a week for work/research with no child responsibilities, but also a few of those hours where I can leave the house and run to campus if needed.

2. Have a daily/weekly routine for Mogi that can be maintained after AJ's arrival so that he has a good sense of consistency and doesn't feel as if his entire world got turned upside down.

3. Have times where I can rest and/or scale back house/research workload when I feel tired or overwhelmed.

4. Contain work/research times so that there is definite family time to spend with Hubs and Mogi.

5. Work during daylight hours so that when Mogi is in bed I can sleep, hang out with Hubs, or do whatever interests me. (I am not productive or motivated to work at night.)

6. Have flexibility so that I can enjoy Hub's days off. (He has a rotating schedule that is anything but 9-5.)

Here's my resulting week:

Monday/Wednesday/Friday
7:00a- Wake up, get some coffee/snack, spend time reading Bible and in prayer
7:45- Jump in the shower, get dressed.
8:00- Mogi is awake. Change his diaper, get him dressed, and give him some milk.
8:20- Fix my hair and face while Mogi plays in his room.
8:30- Breakfast for everyone who is home. I've been on a bagel w/PB kick. Mogi either has an iron-fortified cereal with milk or bagel w/PB and then some fruit plus more milk.
9:00- Clean up breakfast mess and any mess from the night before, if there is one. Mogi plays with toys in the kitchen (pots and pans, tupperware cabinet, or playhouse) while I work.
9:15- Work on more chores in the kitchen if I have them (laundry, baking, food/dinner prep, etc) or head to Mogi's room to play with toys.
10:00- Head out to run errands if we have them, taking a snack along. Have a family adventure if Ro has a day off.
11:30- Usually back home. Chill out by reading some books or watching a Baby Einstein video together.
12p(noon)- Lunch
If Hubs is home, we usually end up eating previous nights leftovers or I'll whip something interesting out of leftovers (quesadilla from leftover pork BBQ). He's not big on sandwiches. If we do eat sandwiches, I make grilled cheese and meat.
If its just Mogi and I we choose from the following: noodles and tomato sauce (aka spaghetti); lunchmeat, cheese and bread; "pizza" (mini-bagel or tortilla with a pepperoni, red sauce and cheese warmed on top); PB and J; baked beans; black bean quesadilla. We usually save fruit for the end of the meal. I try to give him a serving of yogurt with active cultures once a day. Some days its at a snack, other days during lunch.

12:20- Mogi goes down for afternoon nap. When he goes down I try to put in 2 hours of research.
2:15- I try to get a moment of rest with my feet up. If I get lucky I close my eyes for a few minutes.
3:00- Mogi is awake from his nap (Usually between 2:45 and 4p, depending on his mood and what we've been up to). Diaper change and cup with milk and free play in his room or where ever I am. If Ro is around, and especially is Mogi hasn't seen him earlier in the day, he runs straight for him and "demands" some attention.
3:30 Snack for Mogi. Usually crackers of some type, a small amount of fruit, and more of his milk.
4:00- Dinner prep/cooking and house cleaning/vacuuming/de-cluttering. A good bit of this occurs in the kitchen with music going so we can dance and play.
4:30- Family time. Ro is usually around at this time, so the boys may play together while I finish in the kitchen, or we all hang out and play.
5:15- Dinnertime. We all eat together at the kitchen table.
6:00- Dinner clean up.
6:15- Outside playtime (swinging, blowing bubbles), visit the grandparents, or go to the pool.
7:20- Snack(milk and graham crackers) then bath time
7:45- Diaper, PJs, story, cuddle...
8:00- Mogi's bedtime
8:01- My freetime! I try to really watch minimal TV. Right now I enjoy some Tuesday night programs, other than that I try not to switch it on. Maybe a Netflix movie with Hubs once a week. Catch up with Facebook or blogs. Write a blog. Finish folding any laundry that is leftover. figure out what I need to be ready for the next day.
9:00- My bed time, 4 out of 7 nights
9:45- My bedtime the other nights. If I stay up later I regret it. Its just how much sleep I need when I'm pregnant!!!

Tuesday/Thursday
My wake up stays the same except I have to have the face done and minimize hair so that at
8:20- Breakfast for Mogi and I
8:35- Double check the diaper bag and refill milk cup
8:40- Load up the mini-van and head to "preschool"
8:50- Drop Mogi off at "school"
9:05- Back at home starting my work day.
11:30- Sitter comes by and swaps her car for mini-van and heads to get Mogi from school. I take a quick break to get his lunch together and take food back to my desk to eat.
12p- Sitter is home with Mogi, feeds him lunch and gets him ready for  a nap.
12:20- Mogi naps and the "regular" schedule resumes. (If I've left the house for whatever reasons the sitter stays until I get back).

Saturday
I often sleep in until Mogi wakes me, unless we have somewhere to be. Anything goes for the rest of the day, but mealtimes are pretty solid. Every two weeks Ro and I attempt to have a "date night". lately we've been swapping with some friends and their daughter which works well.

Sunday
Same early morning routine.
9:00- Leave for Sunday school at church.
12:30- Make it home from service. Mogi usually fell asleep in car and doesn't eat lunch with us.
3:30- Routine resumes but we regularly try to have family dinners with my brother, sister-in-law, and parents, depending on who is in town. This is often from 5 to 8pm and happens at our house.

I often think "How do other working mom's get it all done?" Well, I don't get it all done and usually have "dragging" ends or overdue "to-do" lists, but maybe this schedule will help others who are wondering how to best structure their day for their family and work.

Got any tips or schedule ideas? Feel free to share them...

Wrapping It Up

Ugh, I haven't written much over the last week, but my days have been really full. And a bit chaotic. And by the time I get to this hour of the night (9pm) the only thing I can think straight about is cookie dough ice cream and getting some sleep.

But, I do have some recipes to share that we enjoyed last week, and some thoughts on my next phase of school/research, and some antics about being a mama to "mocha drops", but not tonight.

So, stay tuned. I've got a few more rough days and then things should smooth out a bit and I can write something interesting... well, that's the hope anyway : )

Last Class

I went to my last class today. Like the last class of my last class needed for my PhD credits! I couldn't be happier.

My project didn't end up anything great, but I got it done and made my presentation. And my house is still standing, and my husband and I are speaking, and my son is in one piece. Not too shabby all in all. And I'm worn out, but not strung out, a world of difference...

So, if you prayed for my sanity, I thank you for it. God provided time to get it all done, even when it seemed like time was quickly slipping away. (Did I mention I barely had babysitting coverage last week because Mogi's teething got so bad with a fever and the "runs" we weren't sure if he was getting the flu or something. So, we really didn't want to expose anyone else just in case. But, the day after his tooth broke through it all calmed down and even his appetite came back.)

I do have a little more work to finish for my online class between now and Tuesday, but that should not be a problem.

Happy Friday : )

Crunch Time

The end of the semester is nearing for me. That means that "crunch time" is upon me and all the responsibilities of my life are about to converge. My hope is to gracefully emerge from the next few weeks with my sanity, grades, and marriage relationship intact, but that isn't always the case.

The end of last semester, which also coincided with the end of my first trimester of pregnancy, didn't go so well. I got all the work done, but barely preserved my sanity in the process.

Tomorrow's the 19th and in 10 days I have to give a presentation for my only on-campus class. It's not a big presentation, just 15 minutes, and there's no paper to write, so in the grand scheme of things, its not so bad. But, there is a ton of research to be done for the project I am presenting, regardless of its length. I have 20 journal articles to pour over and gather research for a meta-analysis. The data gathering alone may take me an hour for each article, so maybe 20 hours. And then there's running results and putting together the presentation, probably another 20 hours. Now, if I were on campus for 40 hours a week I could have it done by Friday without too much hassle. But, such is not the life I have chosen, or have access to.

I have a sitter scheduled for two 3-hour blocks this week; it's summer semester and the pickings are slim. I may be able to get her to come for another block depending on what the end of the semester is like for her. And Hubs may be able to help some when he's home Friday, depending on what his own schedule looks like. So, I may get 15 hours of child care covered.

Any other time I find to work will have to be during naptime. I could say that I'll do some work after the Mogi boy is in bed, but being pregnant, that just isn't realistic. Especially if I've been chasing him all day as primary caregiver, demolition stopper, and feeding machine. It's a lot more likely that when he goes to bed I'll crash on the couch with a bowl of ice cream and then go to bed myself.

Oh, did I mention he's teething? The last few days have been overly demanding, compared to his usual personailty. Things I could usually distractic him from and he'd find something new to play with have been rationale for full-scale, lose-your-cool meltdowns. And the clinginess factor is way up.

So, although I said naptimes were when I'll be studying, they are unlikelikely to be as productive as hoped for several reasons: 1) Naps can be a lot less predictable when teething is involved. Two hour naps can become 1 hour naps and naps can be boycotted altogether. 2) The mom guilt factor skyrockets when he's teething and I hate to leave him with someone else. I know, I know, guilt is self-defeating, But, none-the-less, its an emotional battle that takes a toll on me. 3) By the afternoon naptime the likelihood that I need a nap  increases 20-fold during teething season.

So, wish me luck. Pray that the grace of God be upon me. That I have the physical strength to care for my son, keep our house running, and get my research done. And that when I do research I am amazingly productive! Oh yeah, and when I reach the other side of this project that I don't owe my husband a thousand apologies for being cranky and short-tempered!!

Back at It

Hmm... A three month hiatus. When I started back to write this blog I said myself that I wasn't going to start writing only to disappear again. And then it happened!

Well, it wasn't that I just stopped writing. I had good reason, I promise. I got pregnant! And man, did that pregnancy tiredness, not-a-spare-ounce-of-energy hit me like a ton of bricks. And you should be glad I haven't "been around" the last few months. I've been so drained that I haven't been a whole lot of fun. Well, that's a nice way to put it. I've been a downright miserable grouch a lot of days.

You see, having been pregnant before I knew I'd be exhausted. And, theoretically, I knew it would be harder having Ramogi, since I can't just sleep and escape reality whenever I please. But, it was a whole lot harder to actually do than I wanted to believe.

And add to that the fact that I was in school full-time. But, I only had part-time help with Ramogi, so I was cramming a full work week into 16 hours. And it was Romanus's last semester in school, which was easier and harder all at the same time. And I could continue this list, but its getting pathetic...

So, when I was pregnant with Ramogi and could barely function, I'd wonder aloud how women feel like this, have other children and also work full-time outside the house. The answer I got was "You do what you have to do."

In my world that translated to: "You feed your child, make your husband fend for himself most days, do what you have to keep the house from collapsing, sleep when possible, 'fake the funk' when in public, and behave like a 'crab-apple' in private." Again, it was not pretty!

So, I feel like I'm on the other side of that. I've made it through the first trimester. Romanus graduated and starts his new job next week. And, by the sheer Grace of God, Ramogi didn't start crawling until a few weeks ago. If he'd gone mobile before then, I'd have ended up in the looney bin! But, we've made it to the "other side."

I'm in class this summer, but this is my last semester of classes! That in itself is enough to make me cheer. I never thought I'd finish my coursework. And just in case your curious, having Ramogi didn't put me very behind in that arena- one, maybe two semesters. Not a bad trade-off  in order to have our boy!
I'm still working from my home office with part-time help to care for Ramogi. I desire to be his primary caretaker, so this situation works for us. I know we all have different calls on our lives and I believe his care to be my first vocational calling. The "other stuff," aka PhD, is important, but its got to be secondary to him and my roles at home.

I'll sign off with a big shout out to my husband and parents. My fabulous Hubster calmly dealt with my chaotic emotions and frailty these past few months. He also never ceases to be a generous, involoved, and loving dad to our son. And all his hard work paid off as I got to see him cross the stage and receive his diploma. You're a rockstar and I love you immensely : )
And to my parents for being around quite a bit these days, helping take care of Ramogi and loving him well. Thank you!

More Teeth

Things are going well with school, when I'm able to focus on it, but poor Mini-Man has had the teeth troubles! Tooth #5 and possibly #6 have broken through. But he is so distressed by the pain that he won't let me near his mouth most of the time.

The whole house has been put on antibiotics and Mini-Man and I are finished with our courses. No sniffles or coughs or green gunk here. Halleluiah!!!

Next week I'm giving a seminar on my proposed research for my department. At this point I feel wholly unprepared and nervous. It doesn't help that I'll be going first out of my peers who all signed up for later weeks. Laughably, I reserved Spring break to present, not realizing it was Spring Break! So, I had to take the only date left, the first! At least I'll have it done and the stress behind me, but my selfish pride would really like to "Wow" or at least placate my committee and the others that attend. Oh, prideful self, how I despise you so!!

There is more I should be writing about: a continuation of "Where I Am Write Now" with some details on all I have been sorting through in the priorities of life and these callings/roles placed on me and what the awesome grace of God through Jesus Christ has been teaching me over these last weeks. But, my time seems brief so I will get to it soon enough.

Oh, and there have been some sweet moments this week with Mini-Man, when he's not in pain. He's really started waving; hello, goodbye, at random people in the store, at the dog. He's also started reaching out when he wants you to pick him up or take him. I can't put into words how it makes my heart leap for my little boy to reach over to me so I can pick him up. Moments like that just fuse into my mind: "This is for real. He is ours. We get to keep him. How can we be so amazingly blessed?"

The Winter "Plague"

Well, I seem to have lost momentum on posting. Quite a bit of that has to do with our house being plagued by winter colds. For some 5 weeks now, Mini-man and I have been experiencing a variety of cold symptoms that come and go at will. On top of this Mini-man is teething. Two weeks ago teeth #3 & #4 broke through. I was hoping that would bring some relief to him, but it really hasn’t. Guess there are more teeth there working their way through.

Last week, after a 30 minute long coughing session, I decided it was time to see the doctor. Turns out my cold had transformed itself into an infection. I hope these antibiotics fix what ails me, but at the moment they’re only making my stomach churn and I’m still waking in the mornings feeling like I’m drowning in an ocean of fluids. Yuck!

Mini-man had a running nose reappear last Saturday. It was infrequent, but it would really get going when he cried. And, poor boy, he has been chewing like crazy, so I know his teeth are giving him fits. But then yesterday, he was really unhappy and when I gave him something to chew, he pushed it away! He’d napped fine and wasn’t hungry, so I thought a walk would be good. But, as I put him in the stroller, I realized he felt warm and was a bit lethargic/limp. It took Hubby and I both to distract him/hold him down to get his temperature, but sure enough, it was 100.9°.  After a call to the nurse, we re-dosed him with Tylenol and tried to get his mind off his discomfort. He ended up going to sleep at 5:30pm, waking at 9:45pm for a bottle and then sleeping until 7:30 this morning.

A trip to the doctor confirmed an ear infection and he’s on antibiotics to speed recovery. I’m really praying that the meds help us “perk-up” around here. I have been so tired that it’s really hard to get “it” all done. A lot of things have to get cut back and just narrow in on what is most essential and important. I don't know how my professors perceive it, but I've just had to be real honest that my son is sick and I may need to stay home with him. I emailed one professor 3 days prior to exam to let him know Mini-man was sick and if he was better I would need to take the test at an alternative time when someone could stay with him that he is comfortable with. I would guess moms using day-care have to do the same things. I'm positive you can't send a sick child to day care.

I have grand intentions to get up at 5:45am, shower, eat breakfast, and study the Bible before Mini-man wakes up, but the reality is that I’m barely out of bed when he wakes up. And on the days, like today, where I don’t have a Quiet Time of Bible study and prayer before the day begins, and then all kinds of things become distractions and I never stop for prayer and study…

So, when I find myself (on this day of no Quiet Time) battling feelings of doubt, depression, frustration, and tiredness that all come in waves, I really shouldn’t be surprised.

Forgive me, Lord; for living today as if You don’t really matter.

Forgive me, Lord; for trying to do this/life, in my own strength.

Thank you, Lord; that your mercy is new each morning.

Heal me, Lord; from this illness in my body that continues to make me feel weary.

Help me, Lord; to wake tomorrow with a renewed body and a spirit determined to seek you first, regardless of all the urgent and important things that come up!

Improvements

Well, it seems that the nausea has passed, at least for now. It hasn't bothered me this week, and for that I'm grateful. Of course, I wondered at first, "does this mean something's wrong with Bean?" But, everything else is still present and I feel oh so pregnant. It's just nice not to have that swimming feeling.
My exhaustion is still ever-present. My mom assures me that I will be tired for the rest of my life, a condition of parenthood. Thanks for the encouragement mom! But, this is a different kind of tired amplified by the fact that there's a little life in me that I have to think of and care for. So, just pushing through the tiredness isn't an option, obviously my body is in need of something, like rest. And doctoring up on caffeine isn't an option either. So, my old tried-and-true methods are out-the-window and I just have to sleep. Plus, once I've hit my limit it feels as if my eyes are crossing, then a headache begins, and dizziness sets in. Whoah... Even the Army didn't prepare me for this.

On a more positive note: Bean and I got to share our happy news with a few more people this week. I informed my major professor who was glad for us and shared congratulations. (Sidenote: I am blessed beyond measure to have an incredible major professor who always encourages me to put family first. Meaning, if something with family comes up that interrupts another obligation, so be it. I've never felt pressured to make decisions that put school in front of my family responsibilities.)
I also shared with a few office-mates, who are very excited. One of them just found out in the last few days she is pregnant also! So, now we are pregnancy buddies! Yay!

I'm looking forward to spilling the BEAN in the next few weeks and allowing our happiness to be very public. No more hiding my increasingly pudgy belly behind sweaters and layers, unless I so chose!