Surprise!!

I don't know about other women, but after being pregnant the first time, it would be really hard to miss those signs a second time. So, can you fathom my surprise when those signs returned 3 weeks after losing my first pregnancy? I really though I must be making it up, that I wanted it so badly that my brain was playing tricks on me. But, I'd been taking my Basal temps and the signs were there too. So, the day before "Aunt Flo" was due, I mentioned it to Hubby. He was watching TV and when I said, "Hey, I think there's a chance I'm pregnant again." He looked at me briefly said, "I'll believe it when I see the test," and turned back to the TV. Well, not exactly the response I hoped for. But, he did say that he'd be very happy and allowed me to express my nervousness.
You see I'd known for five days already that I was pregnant, the way some women just KNOW! Some part of me wanted to keep it completely to myself and tell no one. Maybe, the line in my head went, that will keep my baby safe and I won't lose another one. But, sanity got the best of me and I told him!
That afternoon I bought a test and it came up positive right away. Of course I knew it, but Hubby said " What? No way! How did this happen so soon?" We did a little happy dance together and thanked God for his blessings.
This time I haven't told anyone else yet and neither has Hubby. And I can't say why exactly. Part of me wants to wait until the end of the first trimester so they don't have to wonder if I'm going to miscarry again. Part me of my likes having a secret. Plus, I don't feel anxious this time! In fact, I feel so incredibly free and happy! Its been hard concentrating and I've been drawing smiley face doodles on my notes in class!
I feel great this time. Last time I had a little nauseousness that felt like butterflies in my stomach, I was permanently exhausted, every smell made my stomach turn, and everything I ate gave me indigestion. It's strange to think that two pregnancies so close together could be so different, but they are. This time, I have to make sure there's always food in my stomach and get extra rest and that's about it!