Hmm... A three month hiatus. When I started back to write this blog I said myself that I wasn't going to start writing only to disappear again. And then it happened!
Well, it wasn't that I just stopped writing. I had good reason, I promise. I got pregnant! And man, did that pregnancy tiredness, not-a-spare-ounce-of-energy hit me like a ton of bricks. And you should be glad I haven't "been around" the last few months. I've been so drained that I haven't been a whole lot of fun. Well, that's a nice way to put it. I've been a downright miserable grouch a lot of days.
You see, having been pregnant before I knew I'd be exhausted. And, theoretically, I knew it would be harder having Ramogi, since I can't just sleep and escape reality whenever I please. But, it was a whole lot harder to actually do than I wanted to believe.
And add to that the fact that I was in school full-time. But, I only had part-time help with Ramogi, so I was cramming a full work week into 16 hours. And it was Romanus's last semester in school, which was easier and harder all at the same time. And I could continue this list, but its getting pathetic...
So, when I was pregnant with Ramogi and could barely function, I'd wonder aloud how women feel like this, have other children and also work full-time outside the house. The answer I got was "You do what you have to do."
In my world that translated to: "You feed your child, make your husband fend for himself most days, do what you have to keep the house from collapsing, sleep when possible, 'fake the funk' when in public, and behave like a 'crab-apple' in private." Again, it was not pretty!
So, I feel like I'm on the other side of that. I've made it through the first trimester. Romanus graduated and starts his new job next week. And, by the sheer Grace of God, Ramogi didn't start crawling until a few weeks ago. If he'd gone mobile before then, I'd have ended up in the looney bin! But, we've made it to the "other side."
I'm in class this summer, but this is my last semester of classes! That in itself is enough to make me cheer. I never thought I'd finish my coursework. And just in case your curious, having Ramogi didn't put me very behind in that arena- one, maybe two semesters. Not a bad trade-off in order to have our boy!
I'm still working from my home office with part-time help to care for Ramogi. I desire to be his primary caretaker, so this situation works for us. I know we all have different calls on our lives and I believe his care to be my first vocational calling. The "other stuff," aka PhD, is important, but its got to be secondary to him and my roles at home.
I'll sign off with a big shout out to my husband and parents. My fabulous Hubster calmly dealt with my chaotic emotions and frailty these past few months. He also never ceases to be a generous, involoved, and loving dad to our son. And all his hard work paid off as I got to see him cross the stage and receive his diploma. You're a rockstar and I love you immensely : )
And to my parents for being around quite a bit these days, helping take care of Ramogi and loving him well. Thank you!